Singing myself to sleep, you're still my favorite melody...

its been three weeks

how long can this go on?

singing myself to sleep,

you're haunting every memory

hmm...

funny how things work out huh?

i guess in a way i shouldve known

you would think i'd listen to my instincts

theyre usually right you know?

get out.

goodbye.

get out

of my life.

yeah well.

easier said than done.

im not one for giving up

but is this really worth it?

i never said i was the best thing for you.

i wrote two songs yesterday afternoon

and another today.

go figure.

sigh.

here we go again...

cuz im drowning

when i close my eyes

and im falling

i cant breathe tonight...

end of story.

i fade to black inside.

[[Zzzz -The Cab]]

I wanna run through the halls of my high school. I want to scream at the top of my lungs...

I just found out there's no such thing as the real world

Just a lie you've got to rise above...

It feels like today is a saturday.

I dont think my mind is allowing itself to comprehend that today is monday.

the monday after graduation.

and i am no longer going to high school.

I think im in denial.

Friday night.

everything passed by like in a dream

my main focus was:

dont get suffocated in the manwich.

dont cry.

dont trip

dont forget to shake with the right hand

and dont forget to take the diploma.

I didnt suffocate surrounded by all those guys.

[apparently girls dont really have last names starting with MA]

I really didnt cry like i thought i would.

Except for when they had a moment of silence for Kervin.

but ill get to that in a bit.

I didnt trip.

thank God

[but i did make up for it yesterday when i fell down a flight of stairs. now my foot hurts and im limping around my house like an idiot.]

I shook with the right and i took my diploma.

[and i managed to even do it rather gracefully.]

so i guess everything worked out alright.

Its so. surreal.

and Kervin.

oh my.

I wish he had been there.

I have never cried so hard before. i was sobbing all throughout that moment of silence

i think the two guys beside me thought i was going insane.

that night was beautiful too.

i was so worried it was going to rain.

thank God it didnt.

hmmm.

Im a High School Graduate?

I like how that sounds.

so where do I go from here?

how do i continue?

what should i do this summer?

hmmm.

road trip?

:]

Either way:

I just can't wait til my ten year reunion

I'm gonna bust down the double doors

And when i stand on these tables before you

You will know what an asylum's for...

Every new beginning comes from some other beginnings end...

In a bit less than two days...

i will be a highschool graduate.

I honestly dont think its completely sunk in yet.

i got my cap and gown today and i tried it on.

it felt weird to be wearing something like that

like im used to wearing those kind of robes because of choir but...

>.<

this is insane.

i still remember 8th grade graduation.

i still remember 6th grade promotion.

its like ive passed through everything in a dream

Im so excited for whats to come.

but the anticipation is also what scares me.

Im going to cry so much.

I cannot imagine how its going to be

all i know is that it will be wonderful.

Ive written soo much too.

in people's yearbooks

ive never written this much before

but now im writing everything.

even for people i barely know.

its insane...

>.<

i cant believe it.

i wonder if everyone feels this way.

or is it just me?

i dont know.

i have a headache and im tired.

ill leave on this note though,

i wrote it in a friend's yearbook...

We have all the time in the world,

And its just starting now...